Don't Touch the White Woman!

The story follows General George Armstrong Custer's adventures from his West Point days to his death. He defies orders during the Civil War, trains the 7th Cavalry, appeases Chief Crazy Horse and later engages in bloody battle with the Sioux nation.

Five friends are released from prison and do their best to stay out trouble. While trying to mind their own business (and run their 5-Star Cleaning Service), they are caught up in a war between rival Triad gangs fighting for control of the counterfeit currency market.

A brash American movie producer arrives at an army base in England wanting to shoot a movie and use the soldiers as extras. The base commander doesn't want any part of it, but the producer and his secretary cook up a scheme to trick the officer into letting him use the base and its men. Their plan succeeds, but things don't turn out quite the way they were expecting.

Two out-of-work actors -- the anxious, luckless Marwood and his acerbic, alcoholic friend, Withnail -- spend their days drifting between their squalid flat, the unemployment office and the pub. When they take a holiday "by mistake" at the country house of Withnail's flamboyantly gay uncle, Monty, they encounter the unpleasant side of the English countryside: tedium, terrifying locals and torrential rain.

Sherlock Holmes is as dashing as ever, but with a little secret: Dr. Watson is the brains behind the operation. When Reginald Kincaid, the actor he has hired to play Holmes becomes insufferable, Watson fires him and tries to go out on his own, but finds that he has done too good a job building Holmes up in the public's mind.

Amidst the French revolution, Citizen Robespierre is beheading the aristocracy! When word gets to England, noblemen Sir Rodney Ffing and Lord Darcy Pue take it upon themselves to aid their French counterparts. Sir Rodney is a master of disguise, and becomes 'The Black Fingernail' scourge of Camembert and Bidet, leaders of the French secret police.

Francis Bigger, a notorious charlatan who tours the country lecturing on the subject of mind over matter, slips off the platform in the middle of his performance and ends up in hospital under the care of Dr Tinkle. The hospital is about to enter a period of total chaos.

Five oddball criminals planning a bank robbery rent rooms on a cul-de-sac from an octogenarian widow under the pretext that they are classical musicians.

Pressure from his boss and a skin-cream client produces a talking boil on a British adman's neck.

Henry VIII has just married Marie of Normandy, and is eager to consummate their marriage. Unfortunately for Henry, she is always eating garlic, and refuses to stop. Deciding to get rid of her in his usual manner, Henry has to find some way of doing it without provoking war with Marie's cousin, the King of France. Perhaps if she had an affair...

A gang of thieves plan to make their fortune by stealing a shipment of contraceptive pills from Finisham maternity hospital. They assume disguises and infiltrate the hospital, but everything doesn't go according to plan. The hypochondriac consultant Sir Bernard Cutting, Matron and the doctors and nurses at Finisham have a habit of getting in the way.

Bertram Oliphant 'Bo' West wants to clear his unjustly smeared reputation, so he joins the Foreign Legion—with Simpson his manservant in tow. But the fort they get posted to is full of eccentric legionnaires, and there's trouble brewing with the locals too. Unbeknown to Bo, his lady love has followed him in disguise.

Thanks to a series of comic mishaps, a timid, small-town office clerk finds himself wanted by the police and labeled by the media as "Public Enemy No. 2."

Childlike Englishman, Mr. Bean, is an incompetent watchman at the Royal National Gallery. After the museum's board of directors' attempt to have him fired is blocked by the chairman, who has taken a liking to Bean, they send him to Los Angeles to act as their ambassador for the unveiling of a historic painting to humiliate him. Fooled, Mr. Bean must now successfully unveil the painting or risk his and a hapless Los Angeles curator's termination.

In 1962 New York City, love blossoms between a playboy journalist and a feminist advice author.

A lowly pencil pusher working for MI7, Johnny English is suddenly promoted to super spy after Agent One is assassinated and every other agent is blown up at his funeral. When a billionaire entrepreneur sponsors the exhibition of the Crown Jewels—and the valuable gems disappear on the opening night and on English's watch—the newly-designated agent must jump into action to find the thief and recover the missing gems.

School headmaster Brian Stimpson is obsessed with timeliness, order, and discipline. Brian misses his train after meticulously preparing a speech for an education conference. With no one else to turn to, he asks young former student Laura Wisely for a ride. Laura, upset over a break-up, agrees to drive him in her parents' car - which alarms her mother and father, who worry that she has run away with a married man and subsequently alert the police.

The famous Pink Panther jewel has once again been stolen and Inspector Clouseau is called in to catch the thief. The Inspector is convinced that 'The Phantom' has returned and utilises all of his resources – himself and his Asian manservant – to reveal the identity of 'The Phantom'.

During World War II, two French civilians and a downed British Bomber Crew set out from Paris to cross the demarcation line between Nazi-occupied Northern France and the South. From there they will be able to escape to England. First, they must avoid German troops – and the consequences of their own blunders.

A farce about cousins Aage and Viggo, whom Aage's girlfriend Else no longer wants living with them. The cousins then become embroiled in a rebellion against their workplace, Multi-Max, and against society in general, with chaotic consequences.